♥Saturday, June 27, 2009♥
Starting to dislike about myself...
Knowing dat i have changed alot since im sec 1...Many things around mie changes too...BUt im 1 of the changes that make the TODAY mie unhappie ler...ii starting to dislike my sec sch life...Even the moments of happiness.Not reallie happie at all,compare to pri sch life.Friends were fun and easy-going...No spoiler all veri supportive and playful like mie...Now,hmm...far away from joy.More of sadness and sorrow.Sometimes even got peers problems.When added to more burdens,Cant breathe.
Losing the distance of my close friend since sec 1,she dun reallie bothers about mie anymore,starting to think dat,im no longer needed by ANYONE:(and no longer important and remembered...Hmm,sometimes i jux wonders wad did ii do...to deserve such...such...UNHAPPINESS:( sob sob...and,ii have also managed to keep my freedom of being single fer 5months plus...Im abit please.hahax:p but still missing the days of being love and care about...Unlike now.
Hiaz...hope ii could turn time back at some moment.Cause,i've tried to forget some things...but,it still remains.den ii realise,Moments of joy and happness dun lastand can be faded away,but times of sorrow and pain ish always in our mind and forever Remembered...Why???and oso,Hearts are often broken by Unspoken words...when,ii ask myself,"can ii trust in my own heart with my mind onli one???''its still a Question that ish without a valid answered.My mind ish jux full of Unanswered Questions...dats left for mie to clear...Arrg!Happiness ish now further away for mie to reach for...
How can ii make myself Happier...
Knowing dat i have changed alot since im sec 1...Many things around mie changes too...BUt im 1 of the changes that make the TODAY mie unhappie ler...ii starting to dislike my sec sch life...Even the moments of happiness.Not reallie happie at all,compare to pri sch life.Friends were fun and easy-going...No spoiler all veri supportive and playful like mie...Now,hmm...far away from joy.More of sadness and sorrow.Sometimes even got peers problems.When added to more burdens,Cant breathe.
Losing the distance of my close friend since sec 1,she dun reallie bothers about mie anymore,starting to think dat,im no longer needed by ANYONE:(and no longer important and remembered...Hmm,sometimes i jux wonders wad did ii do...to deserve such...such...UNHAPPINESS:( sob sob...and,ii have also managed to keep my freedom of being single fer 5months plus...Im abit please.hahax:p but still missing the days of being love and care about...Unlike now.
Hiaz...hope ii could turn time back at some moment.Cause,i've tried to forget some things...but,it still remains.den ii realise,Moments of joy and happness dun lastand can be faded away,but times of sorrow and pain ish always in our mind and forever Remembered...Why???and oso,Hearts are often broken by Unspoken words...when,ii ask myself,"can ii trust in my own heart with my mind onli one???''its still a Question that ish without a valid answered.My mind ish jux full of Unanswered Questions...dats left for mie to clear...Arrg!Happiness ish now further away for mie to reach for...
How can ii make myself Happier...
♥Smile can be deceiving♥
@ 10:24 PM
@ 10:24 PM
♥Thursday, June 25, 2009♥
It had been bout a week since i last blogged...
hahax:P been busy with my friend relative funeral who i know as ye ye(grandfather).Yar...got ton with her and friends and stay with her to be her company and all...Though i neva blog,but ii do have a journal with mie all the while so dat i can write it whenever ii feel like it too jux like now..hahax:P kaes,oso been happie dat im still in contact with my pri sch friends...Much more fun den some sec sch friend...reallie!hahax:P thanks to...Carmen,weng leong,jia liand,pei qi,claudia,charmain,alison...so far still in contact with them.yea!
A letter to "yeye",
you may have left us,but those memories you have left with us,will never be brought away...and the days when you treated us with all ur love,care and concern will always remained in our deepest heart...In my whole life,ii had neva seen my "real" gandpa till the day he passed away..den ii seen him.You may not be my yeye but ii have regared you like my own yeye...Sometimes,even though im quite envy of carmen ur grand daughter,of having such good family member like you,her mummy and daddy and her sister.ur were so wonderful being together like a happie family...it jux make mie so jealous of your...- -!But ii still remember the shirt that you once bought fer mie and carmen..i treasure jux like my own yeye bought to mie de...Its was my veri FIRST and veri LAST gift from you...I oso believe dat good moments dun last...you have made difference in my life since the day you came into my life.and you also had left in a blink of an eye...Nevertheless,i will always remember you deeply in my heart,my "yeye",love you always.
jessica:P
This time i have learn to cherish all the people around mie when they are still here with mie by my side...i'll love them like i never love them b4!muackz:P
hahax:P been busy with my friend relative funeral who i know as ye ye(grandfather).Yar...got ton with her and friends and stay with her to be her company and all...Though i neva blog,but ii do have a journal with mie all the while so dat i can write it whenever ii feel like it too jux like now..hahax:P kaes,oso been happie dat im still in contact with my pri sch friends...Much more fun den some sec sch friend...reallie!hahax:P thanks to...Carmen,weng leong,jia liand,pei qi,claudia,charmain,alison...so far still in contact with them.yea!
A letter to "yeye",
you may have left us,but those memories you have left with us,will never be brought away...and the days when you treated us with all ur love,care and concern will always remained in our deepest heart...In my whole life,ii had neva seen my "real" gandpa till the day he passed away..den ii seen him.You may not be my yeye but ii have regared you like my own yeye...Sometimes,even though im quite envy of carmen ur grand daughter,of having such good family member like you,her mummy and daddy and her sister.ur were so wonderful being together like a happie family...it jux make mie so jealous of your...- -!But ii still remember the shirt that you once bought fer mie and carmen..i treasure jux like my own yeye bought to mie de...Its was my veri FIRST and veri LAST gift from you...I oso believe dat good moments dun last...you have made difference in my life since the day you came into my life.and you also had left in a blink of an eye...Nevertheless,i will always remember you deeply in my heart,my "yeye",love you always.
jessica:P
This time i have learn to cherish all the people around mie when they are still here with mie by my side...i'll love them like i never love them b4!muackz:P
♥Smile can be deceiving♥
@ 3:30 PM
@ 3:30 PM
♥Wednesday, June 10, 2009♥
Coming up next will be from 8th june till 10th of june OAC camp!at coasta sand:P
Yoz yoz!jux came bck from camp!!! All this pics were from 8th june till 10th of june 2009.
♥Smile can be deceiving♥
@ 8:27 PM
@ 8:27 PM
♥Saturday, June 6, 2009♥
Today's Climbing Training:(
<<<<<<(saying,im too "hard-working" liao...dats yy got blisters.lolz >>>>>>>!hahax:P)also telling u dat,i reallie try my BEST!!!yea:P
Wahhz...today training was so damm "fun" cause i managed to try the 20meters rock wall and have completed it!I find it that it was a great achievement for fer mie,cause...Firstly,im a little bit afraid of height and oso the time fer climbing was not right.The sun was burning that affected my climb because,the weatehr was so heaty and the tiles on the wall was heating...In addition,it causes mie to feel giddy or headache easily...and we was not allow to go 7-11 shop to buy drinks...and was onli allow to drink from the water cooler...because i was lazy,i din go.By the way,when i climbed the 20 meters wall,when i reached the top,the view was veri nice!but if in the middle of the climb you was to look down...tell you,ur heart ish going to sink.hahax:P it was damm scary cause it was reallie veri high...But den,it ish still a great experience fer mie today!yea!
After awhile of resting,im told that we are training on our Speed climb for the next coming up Competition which ish the NSSCC(National School Sports Climbing Competition)yea...So i trained with my seniors...Then,i tried a trail climb at first...Those tiles was far apart from one another and because of my "height" i would have to jump higher and reach out fer it...Its was Quite tiring.So after3times of TRIES...i rested awhile and helped my seniors to belay...One of my senior ramdhan was one of the most fast in 2009 climbing guy in my cca,and he was to speed up.I was so afraid i might not be able to catch up his speed by puling the rope fast so there was a "rope man" to help out.ANd it was my close friend dona.As he speed,i pulled and pulled.But because he ish too fast...towards the end,my rope man din reallie pull finish the slacks and i was veri neervous...and at the same moment when ramdhan tapped the "last tile"i "fly" because he was heavier den mie and dere will oso be pressure.So,the next time he was to climb,not onli him...My rope man den change to my coach "corine".
Many climbers den start training speed and i help to belay..many times i "fly" cuz im lighter den them...Den my coaCh decided to time the end of the belaying rope to a chain den hook to my harness...I LAUGHED.cause,out of the blue...i find myself look like a dog being lock to a chain in order to stop mie from flying far away...Because of my own safety...But even though i was tied to the Chain,i still fly...and got once,i kana rope slap...meaning the rope slight against my arm...causing something like rope burn.and i shouted.cause it hurts...LAstly after everyone had wanted to try have got there chance to finished it,IT WAS MY TURN:( i give in all my best and i managed to get my record of 30secs and den my reward of speeding was...3big bleedster!!!I was so mad at myself...and also abit sad.Cause i tot i would break my record and will not have bleedster for today's training but in the end after my one last climb,3 BIG BLEEDSTER POP OUT!!!Arrg...and it hurts badly...DEn i started mumbling and making noise...HAHAX:P
We ended our training by doing 10 pull up and hangs fer long after all OAC members have finish their 10 pull up and briefing den..DISMISSED!:P yea...hahax:P
THE END:P
♥Smile can be deceiving♥
@ 4:55 PM
@ 4:55 PM
♥Thursday, June 4, 2009♥
Its does not matter how people look at you at some times...
it onli matter from the way exuu are looking at yourself.cause,its exuu hu ish being urself and no one can be you...Its always wad u believe in dat things can be done...Dun say "it had already ended when exuu have not even started it." -[["It ish always the first step that u r willing to take to begins a journey of ur life!]]-
I dreamed of being alone...
Looking up at the sky which once had dazzled me
I remember my palm
Blow wind,to the white feathers
unlock the key to my weavering memories
Please reach the other side,even if it means the very END.
I will return back the smile to you,towards tomorrow...
When exuu found happiness,exuu will realise wads Loneliness ish...and by the time exuu found out wads Love ish...its already too late.IM HIDING THE CONFUSION IN MY UNEASY EYES...
IT HURTS TO SMILE...
~She did not know why.
And besides,the girl had never wonders why...
BECAUSE,she had been there BEFORE she realised!~
it onli matter from the way exuu are looking at yourself.cause,its exuu hu ish being urself and no one can be you...Its always wad u believe in dat things can be done...Dun say "it had already ended when exuu have not even started it." -[["It ish always the first step that u r willing to take to begins a journey of ur life!]]-
I dreamed of being alone...
Looking up at the sky which once had dazzled me
I remember my palm
Blow wind,to the white feathers
unlock the key to my weavering memories
Please reach the other side,even if it means the very END.
I will return back the smile to you,towards tomorrow...
When exuu found happiness,exuu will realise wads Loneliness ish...and by the time exuu found out wads Love ish...its already too late.IM HIDING THE CONFUSION IN MY UNEASY EYES...
IT HURTS TO SMILE...
~She did not know why.
And besides,the girl had never wonders why...
BECAUSE,she had been there BEFORE she realised!~
♥Smile can be deceiving♥
@ 11:17 PM
@ 11:17 PM
♥♥
Im being inspired by this ANIME show...hahax:P
maybe some animes show are worth watching it not to kill time..but to understand some things that happen in life and maybe things dat happen to exuu yea???from this anime show...i have realise some things i have been unaware fer so long...and i ahve been waken up!keke:P
Check this out...http://www.animefreak.tv/watch/ef-tale-memories-episode-11-english-dubbed-online-free this is the last episode of the show...and the ending was touching.maybe exuu guys should watch from the beginning as to understand the whole show ritez...hahax:P
hmm...wad a nice show!:P
heheez:P
maybe some animes show are worth watching it not to kill time..but to understand some things that happen in life and maybe things dat happen to exuu yea???from this anime show...i have realise some things i have been unaware fer so long...and i ahve been waken up!keke:P
Check this out...http://www.animefreak.tv/watch/ef-tale-memories-episode-11-english-dubbed-online-free this is the last episode of the show...and the ending was touching.maybe exuu guys should watch from the beginning as to understand the whole show ritez...hahax:P
hmm...wad a nice show!:P
heheez:P
♥Smile can be deceiving♥
@ 11:12 PM
@ 11:12 PM
♥Wednesday, June 3, 2009♥
Trying to act cute...<<<<This ish the...-[[Laughing Queen]]-
we look veri weird...Hahax:P like couple sei..But,we are jux BEST FRIENDS kaes???Dun anyhoe ohh...
We are back to "baby"!hahax:P
♥Smile can be deceiving♥
@ 3:43 PM
@ 3:43 PM
♥♥
REFLECTIONS!!!Samantha ish so enjoying her drink!!!hahax:P
Our VIETNAM brother ish so going back in time to the chinese!:P hahax
♥Smile can be deceiving♥
@ 2:45 PM
@ 2:45 PM
♥Tuesday, June 2, 2009♥
The time where i feel like my friends around miie are leaving my side...
Todae,was a veri unforgettable day fer mie!As i had so much fun with samantha and ba thong.We plan to wear veri nice cause we want to make a veri memorable day fer our FRIEND BA THONG!cause...he ish leaving back to vietnam ler...and,we hope we could make himm happie by bringing himm out and enjoy!I was so excited!First,we went to pizza shop fer our Lunch!Hahax:P its was jux the beginning...Den later on,we shopping.Like walk walk lar...Den we went to "toys R us" fer fun!hahax:P we realie had so much fun in there...We took lots of FUNNY pictures...Hahax:P mie and ba thong even sit on a baby trolley!hahax and we fight with a long long rubber thingy and oso play with other people babies who got lost..hahax and den we took some soft toys and took pictures with it!!!Its was so fun:P
Then,we went to the pet shop located at the roof top nearby...and see how cute animals are den we went to the arcade and play the dance stepping thingy den...the drum!hahax:P and den air hockey!keke veri retarded indeed but fun!hahax:P Then...ermm,by the time i think it was early evening den...we took off our footwear and play with the water on the roof...hahax:P den PICTURES again...keke"pictures of you..Pictures of mie..."hahax:P den we went to a shaded place to enjoy the rest of the time and moments together...hahax:P we dance our "old" performance like the "tarzan and jane" and the "1minutes and 1 second" and den...we EMO!!!hahax:P we start taking cool pictures of emo people...lolz den We start toking about how much we hated ba thong to leave us at that moment now...den slowly as time passes...EMOTIONS of sorrow starts to grow...and Tears also Gently falls down my cheeks.At the same time,we was also hearing Vietnam EMO songs...dats yy.and den ba thong was abit sad too...cause we cried fer him...and den,we enjoy awhile of peace and...WE LEFT!:(
Im feeling so sad lar...i feel like im LOSING A FRIEND FOREVER LER!!!:( i hate this feeling...i dun wan him to leave!and BTW,our frenz JHONSON,had left this morning back to his country too!!!OMG...i jux cant take it anymore...i feel dat ALL MY FRIENDS ALL LEAVING MIE!!!This june holiday im like feeling going to be so lonely ler...haiz:(
Another thing was like...i miss my dearest sister DONA LOH!!!she dun seems to be like wad she used to be anymore...and i missed her so much...i feel dat our friendship ish fading...and she dun trust mie anymore...i dun wan!~i hope we could be as close as real sister like sec1!!!Dona,i miss ur real exuu every moment since exuu last be urself...
I HOPE EACH SECOND FROM NOW,WILL BE EVERY TEARS THAT I DRIP ISH LIKE AS MEMORABLE LIKE IT SUPPOSE TO!!!
BON VOYAGE FRIENDS:( I WILL MISS UR DE...HAPPIE HOLIDAY!TAKE CARE,MUACKZ!!!
-[[just remember,JESSICA will remember ur presence always in her HEART!missing ur every second from now on...]]-tick tock tick tock
Todae,was a veri unforgettable day fer mie!As i had so much fun with samantha and ba thong.We plan to wear veri nice cause we want to make a veri memorable day fer our FRIEND BA THONG!cause...he ish leaving back to vietnam ler...and,we hope we could make himm happie by bringing himm out and enjoy!I was so excited!First,we went to pizza shop fer our Lunch!Hahax:P its was jux the beginning...Den later on,we shopping.Like walk walk lar...Den we went to "toys R us" fer fun!hahax:P we realie had so much fun in there...We took lots of FUNNY pictures...Hahax:P mie and ba thong even sit on a baby trolley!hahax and we fight with a long long rubber thingy and oso play with other people babies who got lost..hahax and den we took some soft toys and took pictures with it!!!Its was so fun:P
Then,we went to the pet shop located at the roof top nearby...and see how cute animals are den we went to the arcade and play the dance stepping thingy den...the drum!hahax:P and den air hockey!keke veri retarded indeed but fun!hahax:P Then...ermm,by the time i think it was early evening den...we took off our footwear and play with the water on the roof...hahax:P den PICTURES again...keke"pictures of you..Pictures of mie..."hahax:P den we went to a shaded place to enjoy the rest of the time and moments together...hahax:P we dance our "old" performance like the "tarzan and jane" and the "1minutes and 1 second" and den...we EMO!!!hahax:P we start taking cool pictures of emo people...lolz den We start toking about how much we hated ba thong to leave us at that moment now...den slowly as time passes...EMOTIONS of sorrow starts to grow...and Tears also Gently falls down my cheeks.At the same time,we was also hearing Vietnam EMO songs...dats yy.and den ba thong was abit sad too...cause we cried fer him...and den,we enjoy awhile of peace and...WE LEFT!:(
Im feeling so sad lar...i feel like im LOSING A FRIEND FOREVER LER!!!:( i hate this feeling...i dun wan him to leave!and BTW,our frenz JHONSON,had left this morning back to his country too!!!OMG...i jux cant take it anymore...i feel dat ALL MY FRIENDS ALL LEAVING MIE!!!This june holiday im like feeling going to be so lonely ler...haiz:(
Another thing was like...i miss my dearest sister DONA LOH!!!she dun seems to be like wad she used to be anymore...and i missed her so much...i feel dat our friendship ish fading...and she dun trust mie anymore...i dun wan!~i hope we could be as close as real sister like sec1!!!Dona,i miss ur real exuu every moment since exuu last be urself...
I HOPE EACH SECOND FROM NOW,WILL BE EVERY TEARS THAT I DRIP ISH LIKE AS MEMORABLE LIKE IT SUPPOSE TO!!!
BON VOYAGE FRIENDS:( I WILL MISS UR DE...HAPPIE HOLIDAY!TAKE CARE,MUACKZ!!!
-[[just remember,JESSICA will remember ur presence always in her HEART!missing ur every second from now on...]]-tick tock tick tock
♥Smile can be deceiving♥
@ 9:32 PM
@ 9:32 PM
♥Monday, June 1, 2009♥
Im so Deeply hurt!!! Damm hurt:(
Why ish my friendship so easily affected?!Im like so piss off lar!im not even the one scewing up plans or moods but why am ii the one being hurt so badly instead!ARHG...Why???Why???my heart ish like so heart broken now...its much more painful den being hurt by breaking up with my love ones lar!!!To mie,FRIENDSHIP ish like part of my life!Without my friends...i dun wish to live anymore!i miss the days we had so much fun...and not so much of misunderstanding lar...Why cant we all jux understand each other betta and Give in to each other lehhz...
Samantha,Jhonson,Ba thong...I hope we all can be the best ferever!
No misunderstandings..no quarrells,Happiness nad fun and times together ish all i want! Exuu guys are important to mie...each and one of ur do MAKE A DIFFERENCE IN MY LIFE!!!without your,there ish no ending fer the story of my life in this chapter ler...I LOVE YOUR!!! PLEASE...i beg ur,UNDERSTAND EACH OF US MORE!!!
Every single tears that fall,represent each moment i live up fer the sake of being with u guys...So,hope ur can cherish the time we have been together all this while...Im reallie veri disappointed fer wad had happened today...BUT,im looking forward fer more challenges that ish ahead of us...HOpe we all can merge as one and solve all the obstacles that we face yea???Dont jux read,UNDERSTAND WHAT IM TRYING TOSAE FROM THE BOTTOM OF MY HEART WILL YOUR???
THANKS:P
Why ish my friendship so easily affected?!Im like so piss off lar!im not even the one scewing up plans or moods but why am ii the one being hurt so badly instead!ARHG...Why???Why???my heart ish like so heart broken now...its much more painful den being hurt by breaking up with my love ones lar!!!To mie,FRIENDSHIP ish like part of my life!Without my friends...i dun wish to live anymore!i miss the days we had so much fun...and not so much of misunderstanding lar...Why cant we all jux understand each other betta and Give in to each other lehhz...
Samantha,Jhonson,Ba thong...I hope we all can be the best ferever!
No misunderstandings..no quarrells,Happiness nad fun and times together ish all i want! Exuu guys are important to mie...each and one of ur do MAKE A DIFFERENCE IN MY LIFE!!!without your,there ish no ending fer the story of my life in this chapter ler...I LOVE YOUR!!! PLEASE...i beg ur,UNDERSTAND EACH OF US MORE!!!
Every single tears that fall,represent each moment i live up fer the sake of being with u guys...So,hope ur can cherish the time we have been together all this while...Im reallie veri disappointed fer wad had happened today...BUT,im looking forward fer more challenges that ish ahead of us...HOpe we all can merge as one and solve all the obstacles that we face yea???Dont jux read,UNDERSTAND WHAT IM TRYING TOSAE FROM THE BOTTOM OF MY HEART WILL YOUR???
THANKS:P
♥Smile can be deceiving♥
@ 2:49 PM
@ 2:49 PM
LOMO Daina Camera(mr pink)